Train Ride

My friends and I were a bunch of thrill seekers in our younger years – always searching for new exciting adventures to take part in. How we all survived some of the shenanigans without harm is mind baffling to say the least…

One summer evening I received a phone call from my friend Jon while I was eating dinner with my family. The missed call was quickly followed with two text messages:

“Drive to thus and such location and wait by the train tracks.”

“Be there in 5 minutes.”

It was common for each of us to send/receive odd messages from one another from time to time – pretty much guaranteeing some form of juvenile entertainment.

Full of curiosity, I jumped up from the table and ran out the door. The location was fairly close to where I lived and I got there with time to spare. The short wait was excruciating, as my head was filled with several possibilities as to what was going to happen…

Soon enough, a train started to go by…then I saw them! My friends Jon and Jon were standing on the last train car – pants down and butts exposed. The moment was short lived on my part, but their experience was just beginning…

These two characters hopped onto the train north of town, and planned on jumping off on the southern end. They figured it would slow down as it passed through and would be able to safely jump off before it sped back up – it didn’t and they didn’t.

In a failed attempt to jump off the moving train, one of the Jon’s lost his shoe. Scared shitless, they decided to stay on the train and get off in the next town. That plan also failed.

The train stopped in the middle of nowhere a few hours into Iowa. The conductor must have gotten a tip that there were two hooligans on his train. He walked around, flashlight in-hand, looking for my friends who were hiding in the corn field. Unable to find them, the train took off leaving the two Jon’s behind.

Tired and shoeless, they were able to get a hold of our friend Eric who agreed to make the drive down to Iowa to pick them up.

I’d like to say this experience made us all wise up and stop doing stupid things, but that would be a lie. Fortunately, no one was hurt…

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